Native American Zodiac

Otter: Jan 20 - Feb 18
The Otter has an unusual way of looking at things, but he/she is equipped with a brilliant imagination and intelligence, allowing him/her an edge over every one else. Often very perceptive and intuitive, the Otter makes a very good friend, and can be very attentive. In a nurturing environment the Otter is sensitive, sympathetic, courageous, and honest. Left to his/her own devices, the Otter can be unscrupulous, lewd, rebellious, and isolated.


As noted by a friend, I am SUCH an Otter.

I have to adjust for being born prematurely, otherwise I'm a Goose. And that can't be good.

Capricorn

You are conservative and afraid of taking risks. You don't do much of anything and are considered lazy. There has never been a Capricorn of any real importance. Capricorns should avoid standing still for long periods of time as they tend to attract pigeons.

This is almost entirely accurate. e.g., I was shat upon by a pigeon yesterday. It is, indeed, why I rarely get out of bed.
Link

Monday

There's nothing quite like sleeping for crap, and "waking up" angry with the world –– every living, breathing thing deserving of wrath. (The non-living, non-breathing things, too, come to think of it.) Waking up full of pure, essentially directionless, purposeless, anger – hate – even. Goddamn, that's good stuff.

Especially when it's one's own fault, more or less. Booze leads to horrifically altered sleep schedule leads to missed doses of the happy pills leads to significantly altered proportions of neurotransmitters in the brain soup creates jilted feedback and feed-forward neuronal loops and further fucked-up sleeping and suddenly every side of the bed is the wrong side and God fucking DAMMIT it's Monday again.

So, of course, because it's Monday again, and every side of the bed is the wrong side –– there is no more shampoo so I have to use the super-manly body-wash on my precious precious curls (What's that? You want me to just GIVE you my old cell phone? Because you lost yours AGAIN AND YOU USE UP ALL OF MY SHAMPOO AND DON'T REPLACE IT??? Think again, buddy, my crappy little phone just got a lot more expensive, you little fuckwit); the cat has shat all over the place, except for in the litter box; everything wrong with the way IT is run is making itself crystal clear to me all at once, and only one of my three bosses is going to be at all sympathetic (and that's probably because he is always sympathetic, full stop, always making peace).

It either tastes like napalm or bureaucracy. I'm not sure which, and the tastes may be blending. And it's all my fault. Or yours. Depending.

How libraries should really work.

For all my climber-friends:



(Click on it to see the more-readable size.)

Also – This comic takes place in an elementary school. Did your elementary school use the LOC system? I was pretty sure most elementary schools used the Dewey Decimal system for cataloging and shelving and whatnot. Maybe this is a very advanced elementary school.

I can't forget, but I don't remember what.

Der 404 Error!

Yep, it's your lot in life. You go looking for something, and what do you find? Nothing. Whatever you were looking for, it's not here. Mebbe it moved, mebbe it ran away. Either way, try something else.

Feel that this message isn't true? Feel that you deserve otherwise? Has the world mistreated you? Feel free to contact my master. He may be able to help.

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Best 404 ever. Mebbe.